searching the extrodinary in something ordinary

Monday, March 24, 2008

I think the best time to write really is when you are stuck in a bus or a train having nothing to do but think. Somehow on my way back today this thought struck me. " Everthing comes back into a full circle". I forgot if it was with an irony or fondness that the thought came to me. More soul searching. Its funny how when you thought u found yourself tat you have to return to the begining and rethink that notion.

Sunday, March 23, 2008

I find it interesting how easily it seems to loose yourself just when you are not looking. Just when you thought you have everything down pat the next thing you know you are not who you think you were. Perhaps i just imagined the whole time that i knew myself perhaps its just a sudden lost of self confidence. But somehow its become some sort of de javu that i have been in this same position sometime in the past. Figuring out who i really am. Strange.

Friday, March 21, 2008

You know its been a long time since i really sat down and bore my soul. Not that i really know where my soul has been lately. Been pretty melancholy (to put it nicely instead of saying depressed) lately. Sounds romantic even, dang if only i have a man in my life right now. Anyways been listening to some oldies lately. ABBA and beatles ha ha ha. I only know a few beatles songs. But yesterday i heard this one which really caught me. I dunno about the rest but i barely listen to songs because of the singer but more of how the song catches my fancy. So anyways here goes "Here comes the sun" by beatles.

Just makes me feel so serenely happy listening to it. I think i am an old soul. But then again i love new music too. I think if i had the chance to have learned music when i was younger i'd probably be doing music now. I feel so jealous of those that had music education. But thats life i guess. Live and let live. But i have to be thankful that at least parts of my life has been good. I think if compared to some i'd be considered spoilt. So i try not to take things for granted.

Its funny how i'd turn out to be an engineer when i really love dance and music and arts. But i guess loving it and making a living out of it is always different. But i think perhaps it still works out for the better coz i think now i have to ability to persue it given of course i dont loose the plot.

Anyways been about 3 months since i started work. I anticipated but nv thought what a difference working life can be. Lately i feel that what i thought i knew, eventhough is true i still cannot imagine how it effects me. Its just strange living it out than having it all in ur head. Its different. Some stuffs happen sooner than i thought and some not quite yet. And relationships with people have been turned pretty upside down. I have to say i have been lucky to have met some great ppl and avoided most of the time the bitchy, vicious, petty types. I wouldn't say i have met them on full force now. But then when i was in uni well i pretty much didnt really have to deal with it if i didnt want to. I mean its just more of a let them be kind of thing. But when u are in an enclosed and small area for like 9 hrs a day 5 days a week. Well not much place to run. But then its not really as bad as it sounds la. Just sometimes i blow things out of proportions in my head sometimes. But then again i do realize there toxic ppl in companies that just makes u feel so ughhh and like they say things that just make u feel bad. Perhaps they get a kick out of it. Which when i think about it is really sad. Them that is

I have someone that kept asking me why am i laughing all the time and if i have some personal dilema and one that keeps reminding me i am not as pretty as the hottest gal in the office. I try not to give a shit. But there is just so much a sane person can take. Sigh, time to face up to reality and deal with these toxic ppl i guess. But i try not to give a shit and just be better. Coz deep down i know that i am better than that.

Saturday, March 08, 2008

You know what, i haven't blogged for so long that i even forgot what my site is called any longer. Sigh, things haven't change i am still distracted by other things even as i am not in Uni anymore. I guess i have just been making excuses all along. Though yes i am evidently less tied up than in Uni when every hr is dedicated to finishing assignments and projects that is when i am not slacking off. Anyways then again i have been missing internet connection since 2 mth ago. And damn does one month feels like one week. Although because of the lack of internet connection that felt like one yr. Not sure if u get what i meant. Anyways been trying to catch up with all the youtubing i have been missing. Its like if i dedicate my whole life to watching youtube i will still not finish it.

And then there is all the dance competitions that US have been coming up with in reality tv. And dance has nv left my bone even as i haven't had a chance to in a while. Gonna look into taking up mayba a hip hop or salsa class soon though i wish i could do both. But i also want to do yoga so i have to pick 2 fr 3. I know i need some exercise going even as i am fearing i have alr grown sideways some what. So anyways back to the dance reality tv thing. Its like my heaven, as of now that i know of there is approximately 4 if not more dance reality tv shows. And this is a snippet from it.

Gosh from all the dancing days while watching korean mtv this has gotta be something which says koreans are some bad ass dancers. I dont think all of them are koreans but imagine entering as an asian team and battling out with those other US teams which are obviously more known for their mtv hip hop break dance moves. Wow, amazing. Inspiring.